Thursday, July 30, 2009

Control Issues

It never ceases to amaze me the faith that a child has in his/her parent. The other day Isaac and I went on our mile jog around the neighborhood. It was one of those very rare Arizona mornings where a hint of rain was in the air. (In other words, we'd get 'spit on' if we were lucky!) He was excited to see a real rainbow and the usual animals that accompanied our walks, wild rabbits, quail and other birds. All of a sudden there was a flash of lightening and Isaac 'ahhhhh' at the wonder of nature. In the past while living in Houston, we explained that lightening and thunder talk to each other during a storm and so I reminded him in case he became frightened at the noise. To my surprise, he was thrilled by it and promptly said, "Mama, more lightening, more thunder ..." which is to say, Mama make more for me!

I chuckled and explained that Heavenly Father creates that and that Mama has absolutely no control whatsoever in that department. (much less in ANY department!) He refused to listen and when it became apparent no hocus pocus magic would be forthcoming from his Mama, he decided he'd settle if Mama would make more wild rabbits appear. Needless to say, he was a disappointed little boy.

I wonder if it stems from the the little game we play while driving around town. "Green- Go!" were among some of his first phrases and he hated waiting at red lights, repeatedly 'beep-beeping' at the cars in front. (hmmmm wonder where he got that from?!) We'd make it a game to see who could 'change' the light to green and of course I'd have the advantage of watching all the signals so I could magically change it at the right moment. Now how did Mama do that?!

But in all seriousness it worries me a little that my son thinks so much of me. My inherent weaknesses makes the fall from his pedestal ever so much harder to take. With the physical, emotional and mental strain of the baby coming, I have been more short tempered as of late. We often 'chat' after we've both had a nap and some time off where I apologize for being so grouchy (grrr, grrrr - Isaac says) While it's a long fall down, I've become increasingly grateful for the forgiving nature of children. When those 'blow up' times come close and I draw him aside to say, "Mama needs space, please go play in your room." and he willingly complies, I am so appreciative of this little man of mine. And when those times come that I've hit boiling before I knew it, he is quick to give a kiss and hug and let the event go. Now if I can learn that same gift of forgiveness with myself and others I'm sure I'd be a happier and healthier person. Perhaps this is what the Savior means in asking us to become as a little child.

As a child, enjoying the simple things of life!

At the zoo brushing the 'nice' goats, which he distinguished as the ones who'd been fed and wouldn't maul him!

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